Tuesday, 8 October 2013

Oh The Things They Can Say...

Children can be brutally honest. Offensively so even. Sometimes I am not sure if honesty even plays a part - more just plain imaginative! Some days after slaving away endlessly making everyone else's journey as simple and pleasant as possible, I catch one of these doosies thrown my way and wonder why on earth I bothered.

Some top comments of late:

"Mum, you've got a big butt!"
I would be seriously offended but since I am a size 8 I am tending to ignore.
"Your butt wobbles!"
Thanks for that. They do tend to do that when the rest of your body also moves with it. Thanks for pointing it out nice and loud in public anyway!
"Mum, you're old!" 
"I know. You don't have to tell me!"
Sorry for attempting to impart some wisdom or advice or just have a conversation.
"Yuck! I am not eating that!"
Frequently spoken upon viewing a great dinner.
"You never..." (Insert your own response that's offensive or self-esteem blasting).

Some of the best but believe me the list is ever-growing along with the kids.

Whatever it is that drives us to procreate is beyond me. After six kids you would think I would have learned that adorable babies grow into smaller adults with opinions often offensively different to our own. They will challenge, offend, retaliate, dislike and oppose us just because they are having a bad day.
On top of the bad stuff, they expect rewards, treats and fun on tap just because they've been born.
They will spend all your cash.
Use all your physical energy like little leeches.
Throw tantrums when you say no to their demands and expectations.
But who can resist when they start their journey with you looking so gorgeous?
Yes, it's a slow disease this growing up.

What charming phrases have your children hit you with lately?
Please share them below and leave a comment!
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  1. oh they really do know how to compliment us don't they? My son asked if there was a baby in my tummy. Sadly, there's not. I told him I just eat too much food. "Oh, that's why your tummy's fat?" thanks kid! He also has the ability to melt my heart thought and often says, "I love you with my WHOLE heart!" bless them. I'm still adjusting to the fact you're a size 8 after 6 kids. That in itself is an achievement! -Aroha

  2. They are cruel sometimes! My daughter went through a stage of saying everything I served up for dinner was disgusting! Hubby did teach her to say I was a sexy mumma and a marathon runner. (I only did a half so pretty funny)

    1. Very sweet! I would like to be a sexy Mumma too!

  3. oh poor you. isn't it a cruel irony that the people you love most in the world can hurt you the most as well. Thank goodness that it's not everyday (I hope!) and that you will be lifted up by their little acts of love again very soon. And keep tabs on this sort of thing: me and my siblings often guilt trip my mum for fun, reminding her of all the things she did as a parent which upset us (yes, we're vicious, i know), but it struck me recently: it doesn't have to be a one way street! Why not guilt trip your little darlings once they've become rational and hopefully loving adults?! Bwahahahahahaha! (evil laugh)

  4. Laughing ! My 9 yr old said to me "Mummy you are fat but not blob fat. You know what I mean?" Ermmmm yes I believe I have an understanding of what you are telling me.
    Other gems include
    "Mayas mum cooks way better than you"
    "I like Mrs Carmody's eyes. They are really pretty. Not like yours" (ouch)
    "Why don't you have boobies like auntie Cathy? "
    The brutal honesty kills me!

  5. I only have one child and he was an adorable little baby who came 5 weeks early and only weighed 5lbs, slept a lot of the time, ate what he should and generally grew into a more adorable toddler. And then he turned 13 and my world turned upside down. I've always been a single mum and handling a rebellious 13 year old pushed me to the absolute brink of sanity. I won't go into all the gory details but suffice it to say, I experienced four years of hell until I had to ask him to move out of home when he was 17. He experienced a life altering event about a year or so later which saw him move back home a changed young man. He is now 26 years old, works hard and makes me so proud. I love him so much. Would I do it all again.....yes I probably would!

  6. Children are the specialist of creatures aren't they? Mine say all of these things as well. Though my worst times are when they comment on the colour of other people's skin!

    Leaving some fairy wishes and butterfly kisses from #teamIBOT

  7. Isn't it just wonderful how honest they are?
    Sometimes it makes you go bright red, sometimes it is awkward and sometimes it is hilarious but it is always from an honest and innocent place.
    Sometimes I am blown away by it and can see how much simpler the world would be if adults took a leaf out of kids books occasionally and just spoke their open truth.

  8. I am giggling quietly to myself, it goes without saying that my children are equally as bereft of tact and filled with hilarity. Nice to know I'm not alone!

  9. Lol. My kids come out with funny things all the time. One of the latest classics was when Miss 5 was telling my husband she wanted to be a nurse. He said to her "oh, you could work with Pa" (who is a doctor). She replied. "No, I can't. He'll be dead by then!". From the mouths of babes.

  10. Luckily I still have some time to enjoy my little ones babble before he learns how to say things like that! The worst I've had is NO!

  11. I have 2 under 2 so I'm only just putting my toes in the water when it comes to being on the receiving end of their delightful personalities. My 21 month old thinks it's hilarious that he knows my name and his favourite thing at the moment is to pat me on the head and say 'don't worry, Kate'.

  12. My daughter once told me that my bottom was too big for my pants - sadly she was right ....

  13. Jods right now I'm battling NO NO NO from m 2-year-old - also he hits me when doesn't get his way or I tell him off, or he just screams and scream if he's unhappy, quite unbearable today, as you can tell from my verbal diarrhea on the subject - ARGHH - right now I think I'd prefer to be told I was fat than screamed at all day :(

    1. Oh the dreaded No's! My daughter said no when she was 18 months old for about a year to EVERYTHING! Eventually I ended up in tears as I thought I was doing something terribly wrong! Good luck with that!

  14. Oh this is hilarious! I often get truthful/far too honest comments from my Grade 2 class! Some pretty funny stuff comes out of the mouths of kids!!

  15. My son once told me very thoughtfully "Mum, I'm just not a fan of manners"
    That's a shame son, because I am!

  16. OMG you post today and mine have the same themes - recently is was the "Mum you just go Blah Blah Blah!" And I get the tummy wobbles one all the time. Its hard to be offended by the truth but teaching them to say it in a nicer way I think is my job.

    1. Lol! I can't bear the tummy wobbles one in a store change room! Never take children into one of those as they make those comments and you can hear snickers from strangers!

  17. haha I love it - this made me laugh out loud! I was beginning to think I was the only old mum with a wobbly bum who dished up yucky dinners! You're right - lucky they start their journey with us as such cute little angels!

    1. Glad to meet another wobbly butt! Little charmers!

  18. 'You just NEVER do ANYTHING for me!!'
    This from Miss 4 while I feed her newborn sister, frequently within 5 minutes of me providing snacks, entertainment or anything else she demands :)
    Tara @ Hand Me My Sanity

    1. Now there's a little Diva in the making! Lol!

  19. :-) I look forward to the day when my little one come up with such lovely gems like this! X

    1. Oh just wait for it! And when they do it to total strangers, run for cover!

  20. Hi I have nominated you for the The Versatile Blogger Award because I enjoy your blog :) http://travellingmacs.wordpress.com/2013/10/11/the-versatile-blogger-award/

  21. Hi I have nominated you for the The Versatile Blogger Award because I enjoy your blog :) http://travellingmacs.wordpress.com/2013/10/11/the-versatile-blogger-award/

  22. Hi I have nominated you for the The Versatile Blogger Award because I enjoy your blog :) http://travellingmacs.wordpress.com/2013/10/11/the-versatile-blogger-award/

    1. Awww! Thank you SO much! I am so happy! I will check it all out when I am healthier. Currently suffering Pneumonia! :)

  23. The twinlets are only 3 and a half and they've started with the blackmail...
    "I'm sad at you, Mama..."
    Ouch! What did I do? What did I say?
    Oh, didn't let you watch TV. Okay. As you were....


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